Men and Women
Her name was Kathy and I was in love with her. We met at a dance. She was a friend of my cousin's who lived in Silsbee. The moment I was introduced to her I knew I was destined to love her. She was small and blonde with thin facial features, a nice smile, and delicate, wire-framed glasses that made her look even more delicate. To make a long story short, we talked, danced, liked each other and started going out.
The only thing that bothered me, and I wasn't even quite conscious of it at the time, was that she had never had any boyfriends, of any significance anyway. How could a sweet, cute, cuddly girl like that reach the age of eighteen without having guys swarming all over her? But as I say, that thought was more in my subconscious than in my conscious mind. I was content to just enjoy having her as my girl.
And I know she liked me. She was always glad when I came and sad when it was time for me to leave. She was affectionate, giggly, full of fun, all those things that girls are when they are happy. When you're out with a girl, you can just tell whether she's really happy or not, and Kathy was happy.
And then she broke it off--after three months. She just said there was somebody else and that she was sorry but it wouldn't be possible for her to keep seeing me, she hoped I would understand. Understand? How could I understand? I knew there wasn't anybody else. We had spent so much time together she didn't have time for anybody else! So I thought maybe I wasn't giving her enough space. But that didn't make sense because she was usually the one suggesting what we did and when we did it.
Well to make a long and very sad story short, it was her parents. My cousin told me. Her parents could see us getting involved and wouldn't allow it. They wouldn't allow her to become involved with anybody because they were afraid of losing control of her. That explains why she had never had a guy.
So what's the point? Women really are different from men. Women are more domestic. When domestic circumstances conflict with circumstances outside the home, women are more apt to act toward the domestic end of things. Kathy was willing to sacrifice whatever feelings she had for me to preserve the domestic environment she was a part of. Most males would not have done that. They would have more acted independently.
Another difference between men and women is that women really are softer. Most males would not have given in to parents' pressure like Kathy did. The emotional stress of going against her parents wishes was too much for her, so she caved in. She was willing to sacrifice her own happiness to keep her parents happy. Women tend to be more like that than men. Men tend to know what they want and they pursue it whether other people like it or not.
Finally, as we can see from this episode, women are more indirect than men. This can be bad and result in underhandedness or can be good and result in their being diplomatic at times, but the truth is that women don't address a problem straight on like most men do. Kathy, for example, didn't tell me the truth about why she wouldn't see anymore. Maybe she was afraid to or maybe she didn't want to hurt my feelings anymore than she had to. But the fact remains she wasn't straighforward in dealing with the problem. Maybe I could have helped her? Maybe I could have talked some sense into her? But it's not a woman's way. So what are you going to do? You can't live with them, and you can't live without them.
I like the voice of this paper, especially at the beginning. I also like the use of rhetorical questions. Overall, mechanics are good.
However, the paper is not successful. The problem is revealed in the title, "Men and Women." That's a mighty big topic, too big for a short paper like this. It is not possible to generalize effectively from one example, especially an example like this, where the writer has no objectivity. The content is not good at all.
My grade is generous, but good voice goes a long way with me.
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